The Soul of Your Natal Chart — What Do You Need to Feel Safe?

Five years ago, my mentality on dating and love completely shifted when one of my best friends casually told me that she’d never date someone with divorced parents. I was surprised by how offended I was. Not only am I a child of multiple divorces, but my own relationship had also just ended. The comment wasn’t even directed towards me, but it was the first time I felt any type of love related defect, and, shit…she was kind of right. Maybe I didn’t know how to be — or stay — in love? I decided then and there that staying single forever was better than ending up with the wrong person, or even worse, getting divorced.

Sounds safe, right? Probably not, but love really didn’t feel safe. So instead, I spent the last five years avoiding love. Or at least keeping it at arm’s length. I eventually realized there were some deep-rooted limiting beliefs that need to be examined. Astrology is one of my go-to learning tools, so I’d pore over my chart to find evidence of my shitty habits and beliefs. Everything always lead back to my 4th house. After an eerie, pivotal moment two years ago (yes, that also aligned with my 4th house) I knew that I had to dig deeper *there*.

Traditionally, the fourth house rules home, family, tradition, ancestors, our roots and even our emotional state. But it’s more than that — it can show us the core of our being, and it literally permeates everything in the natal chart. Think of a tree…its trunk and roots are your 4th house and the branches are extending out to your 1st house (ascendant), 7th house (partnerships) and 10th house (career). It is THE SOUL of your chart.

Take a look at your 4th house and try to identify the basics. What sign is on the cusp? Where is the ruler of that sign? What planets are aspecting its ruler? Which planets are actually in the 4th House? Understanding your fourth house can open the door to understanding yourself, what you need to feel safe and how you could possibly live with another human “forever”.

Some examples from my own chart because I’m feeling lazy:

Uranus on the 4th house cusp (or Aquarius). They’ve probably had a chaotic childhood, in good and bad ways, but chaos feels natural to them. Chaos is comforting. They seek environments and people that electrify them. They might feel the urge to move often, or have multiple homes in different cities. They aren’t commitment-phobes, they just do better when they commit to freedom (this applies to living situations, partnerships and career). Freedom is essential to their emotional well-being. Their sense of home and comfort might seem unconventional to others, but it is HOME for them.

Saturn in the 4th house (and Capricorn, even Aquarius on the cusp). They need to feel that their home is theirs. They are the boss of their home. They don’t mind being alone, especially if it means preserving their emotional health. They might put up walls, but they’re only safeguarding themselves. Capricorn here = sensitivity in the home and relationships. They might like tradition more than others, or at least their tradition. Saturn here also means that these people will put in a lot of consistent effort to bring their emotional dreams to fruition.

Neptune in the 4th (or Pisces). They need spiritual homes, spiritual partners. They’re not necessarily religious, but their spirituality might be rooted in religion. They also need a certain level of emotional sanity (or insanity) in the home. They need to create art in their homes. They are always dreaming, always trying to manifest dreams and they need someone who will dream with them. They need a home that fits their dreams (normally by the water, or somewhere they can hide). Naturally intuitive about “where they need to be”.

Starting to ramble here, and now I’m sensing a part 2 with the rest of the planets/signs. But my point is — when your love life (career, anything!) is stressing you out, go back *home*. Go back to where you came from and think about what you need to feel safe. And while you’re there, think about what you have to give. Yes, I promise that you have something to give and once you figure out what it is, things will fall into place. Hint: it’s the exact same thing as what you need.

xo

Interested in learning more about how you can work with your natal chart? You’re in luck! Book a reading with me today!❤